Can You Put the Wit in Twitter? [Now Updated with Examples, New Prizes and Extra Awesome]

As the late, great Bard of Avon once penned, "brevity is the soul of wit." I couldn't agree more.

And it is in that spirit that I am excited to announce a new contest here on Smithereens. If you haven't figured it out yet, this little game is called Can You Put the Wit in Twitter? (Was it the title of the post that gave it away? The spiffy graphic?)

This competition is inspired by Copyblogger's recent Twitter Writing Contest, but I've added a twist that is decidedly fitting for posting here today- it is after all, Wordplay Wednesday. (What, you thought I forgot again?)

That's right, instead of writing a piece of Twitter poetry or prose in exactly 140 characters as Brian at Copyblogger required, for me you will have to sharpen both your quill and your wit to win. 

The challenge?

Write your best example of witty wordplay in 140 characters or less and post it on Twitter to enter (if you don't yet have Twitter, join here, it's easy), then drop the link along with the full-text into the comments below (but be sure to read the 5 rules at the bottom of this post first!)

Now this could be a pun, but it doesn't have to be. It might be a witty retort, an intelligent quip, a brief piece of social commentary. Be creative - the more clever and concise, the better. (Note: More concise does not necessarily mean shorter.) 

Here's an example for you to get things going up there in your head (I can hear the cranks a-turning already...):

Everyone in town is angry about plans to move the local cemetery to make way for a Wal-Mart. Nobody likes a graveyard shift.

Or perhaps you might decide to go the Hemingway route and use just a few choice words to win us over ... maybe something like this completely original barb:

For sale: Baby shoes. Worn once, didn't suit.

Oh what a difference a couple words can make. Anyway, you get the idea.

I haven't made the restriction exactly 140 characters because I want the emphasis here to be on cleverness through brevity, not just on character manipulation. 

The competition will be open for 2 weeks, closing at 7 pm EST on Wednesday June 18th, at which point I will choose the winner along with my soon-to-be named accomplices judges.

Aside from the glory and Twitterpation associated with winning such a high-brow accolade, the winner will also take home these great prizes:

In Honour of the Art of Brevity:

• A copy of The Collected Short Stories, by bestselling author Jeffrey Archer (he's my all-time favourite author and he should be yours, too!) This special edition is a combination of all the best mini-stories from his three most popular anthologies: "12 Red Herrings", "A Twist in the Tale",  and "A Quiver Full of Arrows")


• A copy of Archer's most recently published (albeit in 2006) collection of short stories,  "Cat O'Nine Tails: And Other Stories." I have never read more gripping tales than the ones Archer weaves, and the lucky winner will have the pleasure of enjoying the whole collection all summer long. 

In Honour of the Art of Breuvage-de-thé: 

(Because what's a prize-list without a cross-lingual wordplay?)

• For the tea-lovers among you (and who among you isn't?), a complimentary basket of exotic teas from Alexis at the my tea cups blog. 

To Celebrate the Art of Writing:

•  An autographed copy of Mark David Gerson's The Voice of the Muse: Answering the Call to Write, graciously provided by Gerson, who also runs a great writing tips blog by the same name: check it out.  

And Finally, to Celebrate the Art of... Shameless Self-Promotion:

• Enjoy a free Online Press kit to help promote you business, your blog or your own personal brand, courtesy of Donna at PressKitTemplates.com.


• Let yourself be pampered by the poetic prowess of How Not To Write's Jamie Grove, who has kindly offered to write an Ode to the winner and post it on his blog (along with a link to your blog if you have one.) Take a look at the one he wrote recently for James Chartrand at the Men With Pens blog, and let me know if this should remain filed here under awards or if I should create another category for cruel and unusual punishment. At Smithereens, the readers decide! (I joke, Jamie.)


• ***NEW PRIZE*** Bob Younce, author of the popular and high-traffic blog The Writing Journey, has graciously added to the lot a FREE 125X125 Banner ad on his site, above the fold, for the month of July ($65 value!) This can be used to promote your blog, your company, your LinkedIn profile, whatever you want. [But no flash or animated GIFs - static ads only.] Don't have a button to use for this? I (Daniel from Smithereens) will create one for you, too.  

Of course, the winner's entry will also achieve eternal life via this blog, which shall never pass away.* And finally, there are a few more prizes that will be added to the loot over the next few days to sweeten the pot even more, so keep your eyes peeled. (If you would like to offer up another prize, drop me a line: smithereensblog at that wonderful google email service.)









And so without further ado, please read over the following rules, sharpen your digital pen, and let's get started!









The 5 Golden Rules:

• To be valid, your entry must BOTH be posted on Twitter and the link directly to your message posted in the comments below ALONG WITH the full text.


• Your entry must be more than one word and fewer than 140 characters long.


• It must be clever in some way shape or form and exhibit some sense of wordplay.


• Your entry must use only real, English words. No symbols, no txt-spk, no creative punctuation (save the creativity for the words.) [Update: I've decided to allow the use of ampersands, because they are pretty common and some people have an eery obsession with them, but no other random symbols or abbreviations are allowed.]


• You can enter more than once, BUT for every additional entry after your first one, I ask that you "buy back in" by providing a link to this post either on your own blog, in the comments of someone else's or on a profile page on your favourite social network. Send me proof of the link and you get another entry - easy peasy. 

And there you go, that's it, so what are you waiting for? Get writing! After all, the first submitter gets a cookie.** 





If you like it, please pass it on or link to it or Digg it, or all three, whatever floats your boat.









* Author makes no guarantees, implied or otherwise, about the eternalness of this blog.

** Cookie not included.